2010 was a solid year for me. It was filled with its struggles and its utter delights. There are things that happened in 2010 that I will forever remember and that have helped build me to the person I am today. But every year is like that. Every year will have its struggles and its joys. And even struggles can bring great joy.
Here’s the overview of my 2010:
- I won my trial and got closure after 4 long years (this will stay with me forever. and my lawyers will always be my superheros)
- An internship with the MoCo council with one of my best friends
- Having my own garden and actually growing things (there’s nothing like walking outside to pick a bell pepper to use in dinner)
- Working at Lowes and trying to learn patience
- Finally getting a great job that pays me to travel with spectacular people
- Going to a Caps game with a best friend (it’s the little things)
- Abigator’s first birthday
- The app Angry Birds
- Getting a new kitten who actually wishes she was a dog
- Being a pseudo big sister
But most importantly, I’ve learned to a great deal about myself and how to handle my own demons on my own with the support of friends and family. And I’ve also learned that saying “it could be worse” may work for some, but not for all. Because in the end, people always remember their lives before and they’re allowed to be upset. And they’re allowed to miss it. And they’re allowed to want to or actually throw things and break things because they’re disappointed or sad or angry. We have to change to survive. We will die if we’re stagnant. But that doesn’t mean you ever forget how it was before. And it’s not dwelling. Because you’re moving forward. You’re allowed to remember. It’s what you do with your memories. It’s a matter of wallowing and refusing to change or living with it and going forward. We have to change to survive. Even if it sucks. Even if we hate it. Even if we don’t want it to. That is the biggest lesson I’ve learned this year and it wasn’t an easy one.
And I don’t really have resolutions for 2011. One, we rarely stick with them. I know a lot of people have one for getting healthy and exercising 6 days a week. My gym is PACKED with new members and I applaud the ones who stick with it. But I secretly hope the others will quit. They walk into that gym thinking that they can run six miles on the first day. They push it too hard and oh, they realize it’s HARD. Like I said, I applaud the ones who work through the pain, the plateaus and have realistic expectations. But all of the “regulars” secretly hate new years resolutioners because our favorite machines are taken up for a month. Call it bitter, call it mean, but I’ll call it what it is. Irritation. I just want to get my workout in because I know I’ll be here tomorrow and the day after that. So maybe my goal will be to not hate the resolutioners as much as I did last year.
But my big goal for this year is to make the PERFECT BETTY CROCKER-SUZY HOMEMAKER COOKIE! Really. I want it so bad. I want the perfect oatmeal, perfect chocolate chip and perfect sugar cookie. It will happen. I will study and test it. I feel like at least this goal is realistic.
Live for your own happiness in 2011. Do something new (even if it’s small like trying a food that you’d never try. and it doesn’t have to be adventurous like sushi). Find your passion and chase it.