survivor island

i don’t know why i thought of this, but it’s a reoccurring thought for me.  maybe it’s because of watching LOST.  maybe it’s because reality tv got itself into my head with all the survivor crap and strategy games.  my reoccurring thought is that if my family meaning, mark, shannon, roy, sarah, matt, my mom and dad and i (we’re excluding the baby because i thought of this before she came along and i don’t want to put her in this situation) were all stranded on an island, i would be the first to die/get voted off.

seriously.  mark and my dad know how to hunt, track, etc.  my dad knows plants that are useful and whatnot.  shannon is a nurse, she automatically wins.  sarah and matt, military, they win.  roy is married to shannon and she has flat out told me that if she had to choose, she’d pick him because he’s her husband and the father of her child.  totally understandable.  OH, and roy would totally be the sayid of the group.  freaking computer genius man.  my mom.  she’s creative.  she can fabricate shelters and she knows how to cook and how to make things sanitary.  she’s also married to my dad, therefore he’d protect her.

i am unattached and relatively skill-less on a freaking island.  i’m scared of bugs (mainly spiders).  i’m the pickiest eater.  i’m the smallest.  i’m a walking bruise.  seriously.  i trip over the most random things.  i can do things that my family can do, but i’m not an expert in them.  i can barely remember how to figure out where north is.  if you asked me to identify a plant, i’d tell you it’s a green leafy thing.  my skill is comic relief.  i can tell stories and make people laugh.  i’m not sure how that applies to surviving on a deserted island… and i can’t spell that well (thank God for mac spell check), so knowing me, i’d write the save us thing wrong because i wouldn’t have spell check.

maybe i should go study the “worst case scenario” books and enlist bear grylls to be my guide in life.  but i’m not eating a bug, dude.  tell me which fruits i can eat and teach me how to make fishing stuff.  do not show me a bug, i will laugh in your face.

deserted island = i’m fudging screwed.

UPDATE: i told katie and chris this story.  both agree that i’d die.  easily.  and when i told my brother this on the phone, he asked me what i was smoking when i thought of this.

UPDATE:  i told my mom this in the car on friday cause we had a girls evening.  she laughed when i said i was fudging screwed but then informed me that they would need my comic humor and that since i’m family, they won’t let me die.  and that i would eat whatever was put in front of me because at that point, shannon would be forcing me to eat.  and it’s either do it willingly or being forced by the drill sergeants….


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