Me: So, I got bit by a bird today
Me: A bird bit me. On my shoulder.
Brother: No sh*!. You’re the only person I know who’s ever gotten bit by a bird.
Me: Yeah, and tomorrow I’m bringing a tennis racket. Bite me once starts a war.
Brother: Bring it home so we can mount it.
Dad: Was it grey?
Dad: Mockingbird or Catbird.
Me: Thanks encyclopedia.
Me: I called my dad, he said it was a mockingbird.
Yoda: Bahahahahahaha. You literally got bit by a bird?
Yoda: That’s amusing
Me: This enforces my hatred of birds. First geese, now mockingbirds.
Mom: Where did it bite you?
Me: My shoulder.
Mom: Did it draw blood?
Me: No, I think it got mostly shirt.
Mom: Shirts. You wear multiple layers.
Me: Thanks mom.
Me: Wait, are there laws protecting said bird?
Me: Damnit. Bugger knows he’s protected and I can’t retaliate.
J-Mo: Blame Hitchcock.
Me: Curses on you Hitchcock.
Yoda: If you kill the bird in self defense its not your fault.
Me: That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Today, I got bit by a bird. Legit, a BIRD. I was walking to my car from my office. I took the horrendous, but saves you 15 seconds, stepping stone path and this is what I get.
Bird: 2 Stacie: 0